To: My LDS friends and family:

I am troubled.
I am troubled by Elder Boyd K. Packer’s General Conference speech on Sunday. It was the one message I heard from General conference. I wish I had not. The uproar from LDS members and non-members is everywhere, so it was not hard to listen. Each day another person gives an opinion on the topic. Today I add my thoughts. I want to start by saying that I think the general authorities are good men who try their best. I even believe that they are and can be inspirational. They definitely do good things. But, they are also human with their own biases and opinions. So I ask, can they be wrong? Of course, the answer is yes. I could list tons of examples where the LDS leaders and the church  has altered its views; even changing a view "that the church [has] been saying for the last 2 decades. Yep DECADES!!" And so could you. But this, is not about what was said. It is about how it was said.

And that is why  I am confused.
I am confused because, Packard’s speech, for me, was contrary to what other LDS leaders have been doing and saying. It was contrary to how I feel the church and its members are.  It was contrary to what I had been observing after prop 8.  Prop 8 and the LDS involvement scared and hurt neighbors, wards, and families. Due to this, some LDS members brought groups together to educate and resolve these hurts. At one meeting where 13 gay and straight Mormons spoke “There was sobbing. There were tears. Elder Jensen also shed tears as he listened and took notes to share with other General Authorities back in Salt Lake City. At the conclusion of the hour, he apologized for the pain he was witnessing.” LDS leaders cried alongside a group of LDS and gay youth. Loving them for who they are. Observing and listening to their struggles. Gaining greater understanding for the gay individual and the LDS families that include gay and lesbian individuals. You can find more to this story here.  This does not mean that I thought the LDS church changed its views but this behavior better reflected how I feel these contradictory beliefs, between the LGBT community and yours, should be handled. Unfortunately, Elder Packer's talk seemed determined to change that and for what?

His speech only caused pain.
Packard gave a “license to hate” homosexuals or to at least look down upon them. Some have said, “He did MUCH more damage with his talk to more people than he helped. A heterosexual married person certainly wasn't helped by his talk. A gay LDS boy struggling with feelings of inadequacy was certainly harmed - hopefully not to the point of suicide - but it was a bad, demeaning talk.” I think this is true. It will have an affect on those struggling with who they are, what they believe of themselves, and how society accepts them. This struggle took 3-4 young boys last month as they ended their lives. Unable to go on and face the hate and lack of acceptance from those who surrounded them. The words Packard spoke were preached as living scripture; a message from god. There is a great weight to any word he speaks and he sent a message to be interpreted and used as fuel to the bigots and prejudice among us against. And its already starting "There's no such thing as gay people. It defies the laws of nature. It's like defying gravity, don't you know?" I read this in the news regarding gay rights. These are Packard's words. Would you say this statement to anyone you know? Now, how about a gay or lesbian child? And yet, we accept these same words from a church leader who is responsible spread the word and represent the love of Christ. The weight of this, for me, hangs heavy.

I am happy to hear that Packers speech has already been altered on the LDS website. The words softened but the message still clear. Like I said... its not what was said that has everyone upset. It was how it was said.

Angie